My mother means well, she really does, but when it comes to sending my Mexican boyfriend greeting cards for any and every occasion, she appears, in this instance, to be "one taco short of a full platter."
Maybe she got too easily hooked on the card-to-match-the-celebrant theme. For example, if someone is celebrating her "Sweet 16," well, there's a card for that. If someone is reaching the big 4-0, there's a whole section of cards dedicated to that. If the card is for a girl, then you navigate to the "Birthday For Her" section. This methodology also applies to instances of restraint: if our family's friends are Jewish, it would be imprudent to send them a Christmas card. If they are Jehovah's Witnesses, they receive...well, nothing, but we are thinking about them and telepathically sending them our best wishes (because I'm told they don't really get into these sorts of things).
My mom, however, has become a bit too entrenched in this approach, as she seemingly can only select cards for my boyfriend that contain one--or a terrible combination--of these four elements:
1) A sombrero.
2. A chihuahua.
3. Any card that consists of 95% English with maybe one or two Spanish words thrown in for pizzazz.
*Note: My mother would never actually send a card of such questionable taste, but I am merely using it to illustrate element #3. In truth, my recent Google searches for "greeting cards for Mexicans" and "humorous Hispanic cards" are not yielding stellar results.*
4. Any card that combines elements 1 and 3 and, in addition, incorporates a word-play joke that, for the most part, only native English speakers would get.
INSIDE OF CARD: "...I was having a señor moment!"
How this played out:
Saul: ::confusedly squinting at card and flipping from front cover to inside of card repeatedly::
Me: Something wrong?
Saul: I don't get it. ::Hands me card:: It doesn't make no sense.
Me: ::sigh::Ok, when a middle-aged or older person forgets something, they refer to it as a "senior moment."
Saul: But señor means "mister."
Me: Yes, yes, I know. But it sort of sounds like the word "senior" and since that dog is wearing a sombrero...nevermind.
Saul: ::long pause::So the dog is a señor having a moment?
Me: Yes.
Saul: ::still confused::....ok.
I think we can all agree that there's no harm in a celebratory chihuahua every now and then. But, as I reminded my mother, there is a delicate tipping point before it enters the realm of offensive. ....which I think she understood once I pointed out that it would be like sending a friend who is deaf a card that reads: "Congratulations! Heard you were expecting!"
Maybe she got too easily hooked on the card-to-match-the-celebrant theme. For example, if someone is celebrating her "Sweet 16," well, there's a card for that. If someone is reaching the big 4-0, there's a whole section of cards dedicated to that. If the card is for a girl, then you navigate to the "Birthday For Her" section. This methodology also applies to instances of restraint: if our family's friends are Jewish, it would be imprudent to send them a Christmas card. If they are Jehovah's Witnesses, they receive...well, nothing, but we are thinking about them and telepathically sending them our best wishes (because I'm told they don't really get into these sorts of things).
My mom, however, has become a bit too entrenched in this approach, as she seemingly can only select cards for my boyfriend that contain one--or a terrible combination--of these four elements:
1) A sombrero.
2. A chihuahua.
3. Any card that consists of 95% English with maybe one or two Spanish words thrown in for pizzazz.
*Note: My mother would never actually send a card of such questionable taste, but I am merely using it to illustrate element #3. In truth, my recent Google searches for "greeting cards for Mexicans" and "humorous Hispanic cards" are not yielding stellar results.*
4. Any card that combines elements 1 and 3 and, in addition, incorporates a word-play joke that, for the most part, only native English speakers would get.
INSIDE OF CARD: "...I was having a señor moment!"
How this played out:
Saul: ::confusedly squinting at card and flipping from front cover to inside of card repeatedly::
Me: Something wrong?
Saul: I don't get it. ::Hands me card:: It doesn't make no sense.
Me: ::sigh::
Saul: But señor means "mister."
Me: Yes, yes, I know. But it sort of sounds like the word "senior" and since that dog is wearing a sombrero...nevermind.
Saul: ::long pause::
Me: Yes.
Saul: ::still confused::
I think we can all agree that there's no harm in a celebratory chihuahua every now and then. But, as I reminded my mother, there is a delicate tipping point before it enters the realm of offensive. ....which I think she understood once I pointed out that it would be like sending a friend who is deaf a card that reads: "Congratulations! Heard you were expecting!"
No comments:
Post a Comment